News from Paddington, 2017-07-31
@mildbyte
5 years, 10 months ago
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paddington
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writing
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...By about 10am I had made the decision to throw the badminton rackets away. It's amazing how much extra stuff you become willing to let go of when your mission is to pack the contents of a large room into ...
News from Paddington, 2015-12-03
@mildbyte
7 years, 6 months ago
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paddington
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writing
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Hi, Chicken Cottage on Praed Street here. I haven't seen News from Paddington for about two weeks now and I think I know why (see the attached front page of the Guardian). I dug around in its computer and found ...
News from Paddington, 2015-11-20
@mildbyte
7 years, 6 months ago
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paddington
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writing
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Hi, I'm News from Paddington and jackdaws love my big sphinx of quartz. News from Paddington went to a database conference last Friday instead of going to work! Going to a conference is basically like going to university, except the ...
News from Paddington, 2015-11-14
@mildbyte
7 years, 6 months ago
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paddington
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writing
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News from Paddington steadily keeps approaching legal age as it's already been fourteen weeks since a drunken rant by News from Paddington got out of hand and became News from Paddington. News from Paddington went to see a film called ...
News from Paddington, 2015-11-06
@mildbyte
7 years, 7 months ago
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paddington
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writing
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"...I was visiting a bar there, not unlike this one. They serve beer, not quite as good as this, but close. ... So, I'm sitting there, and in walks the biggest News I have ever seen. Big as shit. Just ...
News from Paddington, 2015-10-31
@mildbyte
7 years, 7 months ago
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paddington
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writing
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Hi, Chicken Cottage on Praed Street here. It's been two days now since I've seen News from Paddington and I haven... (loud thud, scuffling) It's time for the vacation edition of News from Paddington, named like that because News from ...
News from Paddington, 2015-10-23
@mildbyte
7 years, 7 months ago
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paddington
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writing
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According to various sources, including and limited to the number of files on News from Paddington's computer, today is the 10th anniv... weekiversary of News from Paddington! This edition of News from Paddington is hence a special edition by means ...
News from Paddington, 2015-10-16
@mildbyte
7 years, 7 months ago
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paddington
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writing
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You are News from Paddington. It is 10:30pm. You enter London Bridge Station after having a nice walk-and-talk with a coworker over London Bridge. Of course, neither of you are drunk. She left you before you walked into the station ...
News from Paddington, 2015-10-09
@mildbyte
7 years, 7 months ago
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paddington
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writing
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"Hi, I'm PC Savile from the Metropolitan Police Service. We're looking for News... News from Paddington?" "What a weird name. Afraid I don't know anyone like that. What happened?" "Well, we've been forced to arrest some people who were harassing ...
News from Paddington, 2015-09-25
@mildbyte
7 years, 8 months ago
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paddington
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writing
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"Hi, we're from the ONS and we're surveying people's preferences in mass media. Do you have a..." "News from Paddington." "Sorry?" "News from Paddington." "Okay, and how about..." "News from Paddington." "Great, umm, okay, can I have your name and ...
News from Paddington, 2015-09-18
@mildbyte
7 years, 8 months ago
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paddington
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writing
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"Hi, I've just moved here, do you know of a good place to eat?" "Well, there's Praed Street nearby. You could go to the Chicken Cottage there. I heard it's re..." "...ally good?" "...Yes!" "Brother!" "Brother!" Hello and welcome to ...
News from Paddington, 2015-09-11
@mildbyte
7 years, 8 months ago
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paddington
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writing
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"Excuse me, sir, do you know how to get to Chicken Spot?" "You mean, Chicken Cottage?" "No, Chicken Spot. Someone told me it's really go- OH GOD WHY DID YOU STAB ME?!" "Sorry, my grandmother died today and the only ...
News from Paddington, 2015-09-04
@mildbyte
7 years, 9 months ago
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paddington
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writing
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Guess what time it is! It's time to paddle over here for yet another edition of News from Paddington! There are two benefits to a long weekend. First, the weekend is long. Second, the week after it is short. There's ...
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